Letting Go of the Love You Deserve: When He Loves You, But Not the Way You Need

Sometimes love isn’t enough. It sounds like a cliché, but when you’re in it, you realize just how true it can be. Loving someone deeply — truly — can feel like the most beautiful thing in the world, but when it isn’t reciprocated the way you need, it can also be the most painful.

It’s hard to admit, but I know now that I’ve been in love with a version of someone I thought he could be, not who he really was. “You can’t make a diamond out of a stone,” as Taylor Swift once said. And no matter how much you try to mold someone, no matter how many times you put yourself out there hoping he’ll love you the way you want to be loved, the truth is: he might not be able to.

“I once believed love would be burning red,” but sometimes, it’s not even that. It’s more like the warm glow of a candle flickering softly, not the fiery intensity that you’ve been longing for. “And I knew you were trouble when you walked in.” Not because he was toxic or bad, but because I knew, deep down, I was setting myself up for disappointment. I wanted more than he could give, and no matter how much he loved me, it wasn’t the love I needed.

It’s a strange paradox — being with someone who loves you, but it’s just not in the way you crave. He says he cares. He does the little things. He stays by…